Hello there fellow bloggers, it has been a very long time since I've last blogged, I guess i figured it would be easier than I first thought . I know blogging isn't difficult in itself but remembering to blog can be!
A little update.......
I am still living in the northern part of the country, I am still living with the same family, I am still working for the same church. So not a lot has changed but a lot has happened. life has not been easy, and there are many things I really struggle with. I love adventures, however even the greatest of adventures can become hard, tiring, and rather difficult at times. Its true what they say, life is a roller coaster.
|The first roller coaster i ever went on! and it was only last month!!|
Its the little things.... This is what I find myself saying when the people who love and care about me in the south ask me why I find it difficult in the north 'its the little things' i say, things such as not having my own bedroom. This has taken some getting used to but I still find it difficult. It has however made me realise just how important it is for me to have me time, people that know me well know that I am a social butterfly, however if I don't get me time things start to get difficult. The thing I miss most about having my own room is praying out loud before I go to sleep I am a verbal processor this means with people and God, its kind of hard to just chat, rant, moan, thank...well anything really, out loud when someone is trying to sleep next to you.
Other little things like, not having my friends in walking distance, my favorite vintage tea house, my animals, church, my bed! All the things I took for granted. I was so keen to get out of little Hertford and now I miss it. Its true you don't realize what you have until its gone.
What I am so thankful for is even though its been a pretty tough time and I have essentially hit rock bottom and I have even tried to quit, along people keep asking me/telling me to move back home, the peace and assurance I have from God that the North is where i should be is incredible. There is no doubt in my mind that I'm not in the right place which is both great and frustrating at the same time. There is a small part of me that does just want to move home, life would be easier and more comfortable but I think within my spirit I would be uncomfortable.
God uses us when we are uncomfortable and a quote i say to a lot of my Jesus loving friends is 'we gotta get comfortable with being uncomfortable' this is a lot easier said than done. God is teaching me a whole lot and I have a lot of things that I need to do to ensure that I am of use to people and to God. I know God can use us in many ways, however it becomes harder for God to do so when we become tired, empty, resentful, bitter, angry. We have ownership of our bodies this means we have a responsibility to take care of it. I am currently reading a book called boundaries, as you can probably tell it is all about boundaries, this book is such a challenging read and really does help with all areas of life. Not only does it help us to understand where our boundaries lack it also helps us to put in place better boundaries. what i like most about this book is i reminds me that i do have a voice and i can use it so go ahead give it a read and find your voice!